Children are often the first casualties of a divorce. Parents may unintentionally use their children to get back at a spouse. Often times children are used as messengers carrying messages from one spouse to another. They can carry the weight of the divorce on their shoulders.

You can disagree with a divorce but you cannot stop it from happening.

First, you will want to explore options for working on your marriage with your therapeutic network or faith community.  If your spouse is open to going to couples counseling this is a great first step.  He or she may be willing to work on the marriage with the assistance of a trained professional. 

Just like you didn’t say “yes” to marriage on a whim no one decides to divorce lightly.  It is often a process that has been contemplated for months if not years before the final decision to move forward with a divorce is expressed.

Picking a lawyer to represent you can feel a little like choosing which used car salesman to buy a car from.  I recommend you sit down with an attorney and ask them questions around your major divorce concerns.  Take the time to talk through your concerns and see if the attorney communicates with you in a way that you understand. 

The Collaborative Divorce Process, a private divorce or out-of-court settlement option, is designed as an answer to the adversarial nature of the court or litigation process while addressing the less favorable aspects of mediation. 

 Not only is divorce one of the most stressful events a person can experience in their lifetime it can also be the most complicated.  In a divorce it is likely you are juggling major life events like buying and/or selling a house, moving, separating property, dividing retirement, transitioning work environments, telling the kids, gathering information etc. 

Probably two of the most common questions in divorce that I get are:  1)    How much will this cost? and  2)    How long will this take?